I feel Stupid.

now look if you’re gonna come around here
and say those sort of things
you gotta take a few on the chin
you talking about love and all that stuff
you better bring your thickest skin
sometimes you can’t please everyone
sometimes you can’t please anyone at all
you sew your heart onto your sleeve
and wait for the ax to fall

 – Vigilantes of Love – “Skin”

I’m feeling like a dork.

Nah, I didn’t do anything dumb.  I just feel like a dork.

Sometimes I pull back the raincoat to expose a corner of my heart, and the sudden sound of crickets is deafening.  I don’t have any particular reason to think people are laughing behind their hands at me, but I fill the silence with my best criticism.  If I made movies I’d anonymously submit damning reviews to all the finest papers.

Oh well, I guess I’m keeping my promises.

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3 Comments

  1. amazing, isn’t it? the people who pay attention, the ones who have opinions on everything from video games to third world country religions… we usually end up feeling like big dorks. you know, that’s just fine with me. ignorance is bliss, and i’d much rather be a little angry and confused than live unaware of world unfolding around me. i’m so happy i’m not alone.

    1. Yeah.

      I’m usually ok with having opinions about things. I try to hold back until I feel I can state my piece with confidence, and on the occasion that I put my foot in my mouth… well, I do my best to extract it and move on.

      It’s the deeper things that get me. I see someone who I’ve never met in the real world in pain, and I pour out a few pieces of my heart in sympathy, and then I look and think wow… that was dumb. I’ll bet I look like one of those people who occasionally post random self-absorbed seeming-irrelevencies on my own journal. And I want to go on a deleting spree…

      1. i enjoy reading your opinions… and i’m probably guilty myself of posting those seeming-irrelevencies in my own journal. don’t go on a deleting spree, though. i assure you, you’re not one of “those people.” it’s refreshing when an intelligent person has the occasional rant about something random, and includes links to what he’s actually ranting about. as for pouring out your heart in sympathy, one should never feel dumb for actually having compassion. it seems to be a rare thing these days…

        gheesh. that ended up sounding more serious than i wanted it to. damn damn damn.

        p.s. if you’re interested, my husband has a random ranty-type blog. Tao Te Chuck.

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