let’s dance in style, let’s dance for awhile

My mom always said innebriation just amplified whatever you were already feeling, be it happiness, sadness, or anger.

If that’s true, I’m not nearly as happy as I think I am.

Maybe the Buddhists know what they’re doing with the swearing off of intoxicants. Lord knows I’ve been reluctant to get even remotely buzzed lately.

What’s Truth and what’s perception? What’s wisdom and what’s mere justification? How do I know when I’m being the bad guy, and when I’m just standing up for myself?

When push comes to shove we are all just fumbling in the dark.

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26 Comments

  1. Sometimes there’s nothing wrong with fumbling. It’s the only way to get things done.

  2. Sometimes there’s nothing wrong with fumbling. It’s the only way to get things done.

  3. isn’t alchohol just a depressant?

    I think that actually hallucigens are the ones that magnify the already present feelings (although I have yet to try it)

    I know tht marijuana definiately increases paranoia

  4. isn’t alchohol just a depressant?

    I think that actually hallucigens are the ones that magnify the already present feelings (although I have yet to try it)

    I know tht marijuana definiately increases paranoia

  5. I’ve certainly been drunk my share of times

    But the whole experience is a bore, and the physical effects rip me up.
    >What’s Truth and what’s perception?
    >What’s wisdom and what’s mere justification?
    >How do I know when I’m being the bad guy, and when I’m just standing up for myself?
    Tactically hard to tell. If the default response is something peaceful, you can pull back and consider the strategic picture, when the details come into focus.
    How easy it is to spout my nonsense when I’m not involved in the situation. 😉

  6. I’ve certainly been drunk my share of times

    But the whole experience is a bore, and the physical effects rip me up.
    >What’s Truth and what’s perception?
    >What’s wisdom and what’s mere justification?
    >How do I know when I’m being the bad guy, and when I’m just standing up for myself?
    Tactically hard to tell. If the default response is something peaceful, you can pull back and consider the strategic picture, when the details come into focus.
    How easy it is to spout my nonsense when I’m not involved in the situation. 😉

  7. Alcohol is a depressant. No matter how happy you and how good of a time you are having it will affect you in that way.

    “Maybe the Buddhists know what they’re doing with the swearing off of intoxicants. Lord knows I’ve been reluctant to get even remotely buzzed lately.

    What’s Truth and what’s perception? What’s wisdom and what’s mere justification? How do I know when I’m being the bad guy, and when I’m just standing up for myself?

    When push comes to shove we are all just fumbling in the dark.”

    You totally hit onto something that I’ve been feeling off and on for some time. It was so nice to see someone else put it into words. The more I read the Tao I Ching the more I wonder if the club scene is where I should be. I am beginning to think that nothing is “real” that everything is just perception of what reality “is”. I’ve struggled with trying to find balance in defending when I think I’ve been wronged and somehow becoming the bad guy in everything. My experiences with trying to “stand up for myself” seem to be all negative and a no win situation. Just once I would like to do just that and have someone go… hey, you’re right.

    In terms of fumbling around in the dark. I really like to find a light switch.

    *hugs*

    1. In my experience alcohol just acts as a de-inhibitant on me (yeah, I made the word up…) – it lowers my reserves and allows me to show my mood more fully, or brings my underlying mood to the surface. Usually I only drink when I’m in a good mood, and it tends to enhance the good mood and make it easier for me to laugh and have fun. Sometimes it make me morose, though; and I don’t know if that’s just the alcohol or the coming to the surface of a deep pool of unhappiness that I keep locked away.

      I am beginning to think that nothing is “real” that everything is just perception of what reality “is”.

      The Buddhists would say that everything is empty of independant existence. Everything we perceive is dependent, both on other things for it’s existence, and on our perception for it’s appearence.

      You aren’t the bad guy or the good guy. Disconnection, miscommunication, and suffering are the bad guys.

      IMHO, the club scene is good depending on what you want out of it. If you bring to it a spirit of dancing and cutting loose and having fun, then that’s what you’ll get from it. If you come to it to see friends and socialize, then that’s what you’ll get. If you go looking for support… well, you might get it if you’re very lucky. But it’s really not a conducive environment for that sort of thing.

      1. In terms of the alcohol all that you said may be. But as I said, bear in mind that it is a depressant and that alters mood. Therefore, that morose feeling might not even be from “you”.

        I guess I must be a Buddhist at heart. I tried looking into that but I couldn’t seem to relate or feel a connection to it per say. Although Taoism and Buddhism are closely related and Zen Buddhism is by some considered a combination of both.

        I agree on your opinion that the club scene is “good” depending on what you want out of it. I don’t know that it is the place for me as I have a tendency to form unhealthy attachments and attachment tends to lead to suffering. When I have gone out lately I have felt like I don’t really fit in and belong (nothing that anyone has done or said). I just look at all the drinking and the vibes going through the bar. Yes, there are some there who aren’t looking for a piece of ass and/or to get drunk. But I find myself feeling more miserable being around that energy for some reason. Maybe it was that particular day and maybe it was just some deeper pain coming to the surface at the time. I do think it was partly some deep pain and issues I have to resolve. I’m sure that I will continue to make social appearances and hopefully go out to just have a good time in the future. As this is just something I feel some of the time.

        Thanks for the insight.

        1. Yeah, I know, it’s a depressent. So I’m a little suspicious of the validity of any feelings it inspires.

          I guess I nust be a Buddhist at heart

          Or I’m a Taoist at heart. Buddism is my focus at the moment; I haven’t explored Taoism yet. But I will.

          I don’t know that it is the place for me as I have a tendency to form unhealthy attachments and attachment tends to lead to suffering.

          Indeed. I’m a big fan of listening to your inner voice. Typically if you listen carefully, you can ge some pretty good hints about what you do and don’t need right now from your body and your heart. I try to do go with the flow of my Self, rather than acting on habit or in an effort to do what everyone else is doing. I go out when the spirit says go out, and stay home when the spirit says stay home. Last Friday night I went out, but something in me told me not to drink, so I just had a bottle of water and enjoyed some great conversation and a little dancing and then left at 11:30 satisfied. If your spirit is telling you that you don’t need to be going out right now, then by all means listen.

          Of course, the trick is telling your inner voice from the voice of attachment and passion. But with practice and mindfullness I think we acquire that discernment. The voice of your true self is, to use biblical terminology, a “still, small” one.

          Sometimes it takes some time off to retrain yourself from old attachments. Perhaps spending some time alone, and some one-on-one time with your friends over coffee or lunch, will help restore some of the balance and perspective it sounds like you’ve been seeking.

          I wish you peace and blessings in your journey.

          1. I’m not sure how I fumbled into Taoism b/c I had just started reading up on Buddhism. It just seemed to appeal to me.

            Sometimes I wonder if my inner voice is crazy. 😛 I’m trying really hard to work on myself these days and I have to say that reading different books, writing and getting other people’s perspectives is helping.

            I liked what you said about spending one-on-one time with friends over coffee and lunch and that helping restore some balance and perspective. I think that is definately true. I just wish I’ve had more time for it lately.

            Thanks for listening and I hope that we both find whatever it is we are looking for.

            *hugs*

          2. I’m not sure how I fumbled into Taoism b/c I had just started reading up on Buddhism. It just seemed to appeal to me.

            Sometimes I wonder if my inner voice is crazy. 😛 I’m trying really hard to work on myself these days and I have to say that reading different books, writing and getting other people’s perspectives is helping.

            I liked what you said about spending one-on-one time with friends over coffee and lunch and that helping restore some balance and perspective. I think that is definately true. I just wish I’ve had more time for it lately.

            Thanks for listening and I hope that we both find whatever it is we are looking for.

            *hugs*

        2. Yeah, I know, it’s a depressent. So I’m a little suspicious of the validity of any feelings it inspires.

          I guess I nust be a Buddhist at heart

          Or I’m a Taoist at heart. Buddism is my focus at the moment; I haven’t explored Taoism yet. But I will.

          I don’t know that it is the place for me as I have a tendency to form unhealthy attachments and attachment tends to lead to suffering.

          Indeed. I’m a big fan of listening to your inner voice. Typically if you listen carefully, you can ge some pretty good hints about what you do and don’t need right now from your body and your heart. I try to do go with the flow of my Self, rather than acting on habit or in an effort to do what everyone else is doing. I go out when the spirit says go out, and stay home when the spirit says stay home. Last Friday night I went out, but something in me told me not to drink, so I just had a bottle of water and enjoyed some great conversation and a little dancing and then left at 11:30 satisfied. If your spirit is telling you that you don’t need to be going out right now, then by all means listen.

          Of course, the trick is telling your inner voice from the voice of attachment and passion. But with practice and mindfullness I think we acquire that discernment. The voice of your true self is, to use biblical terminology, a “still, small” one.

          Sometimes it takes some time off to retrain yourself from old attachments. Perhaps spending some time alone, and some one-on-one time with your friends over coffee or lunch, will help restore some of the balance and perspective it sounds like you’ve been seeking.

          I wish you peace and blessings in your journey.

      2. In terms of the alcohol all that you said may be. But as I said, bear in mind that it is a depressant and that alters mood. Therefore, that morose feeling might not even be from “you”.

        I guess I must be a Buddhist at heart. I tried looking into that but I couldn’t seem to relate or feel a connection to it per say. Although Taoism and Buddhism are closely related and Zen Buddhism is by some considered a combination of both.

        I agree on your opinion that the club scene is “good” depending on what you want out of it. I don’t know that it is the place for me as I have a tendency to form unhealthy attachments and attachment tends to lead to suffering. When I have gone out lately I have felt like I don’t really fit in and belong (nothing that anyone has done or said). I just look at all the drinking and the vibes going through the bar. Yes, there are some there who aren’t looking for a piece of ass and/or to get drunk. But I find myself feeling more miserable being around that energy for some reason. Maybe it was that particular day and maybe it was just some deeper pain coming to the surface at the time. I do think it was partly some deep pain and issues I have to resolve. I’m sure that I will continue to make social appearances and hopefully go out to just have a good time in the future. As this is just something I feel some of the time.

        Thanks for the insight.

    2. In my experience alcohol just acts as a de-inhibitant on me (yeah, I made the word up…) – it lowers my reserves and allows me to show my mood more fully, or brings my underlying mood to the surface. Usually I only drink when I’m in a good mood, and it tends to enhance the good mood and make it easier for me to laugh and have fun. Sometimes it make me morose, though; and I don’t know if that’s just the alcohol or the coming to the surface of a deep pool of unhappiness that I keep locked away.

      I am beginning to think that nothing is “real” that everything is just perception of what reality “is”.

      The Buddhists would say that everything is empty of independant existence. Everything we perceive is dependent, both on other things for it’s existence, and on our perception for it’s appearence.

      You aren’t the bad guy or the good guy. Disconnection, miscommunication, and suffering are the bad guys.

      IMHO, the club scene is good depending on what you want out of it. If you bring to it a spirit of dancing and cutting loose and having fun, then that’s what you’ll get from it. If you come to it to see friends and socialize, then that’s what you’ll get. If you go looking for support… well, you might get it if you’re very lucky. But it’s really not a conducive environment for that sort of thing.

    3. The more I read the Tao I Ching the more I wonder if the club scene is where I should be.

      I’ve been feeling/thinking that way lately about myself.

    4. The more I read the Tao I Ching the more I wonder if the club scene is where I should be.

      I’ve been feeling/thinking that way lately about myself.

  8. Alcohol is a depressant. No matter how happy you and how good of a time you are having it will affect you in that way.

    “Maybe the Buddhists know what they’re doing with the swearing off of intoxicants. Lord knows I’ve been reluctant to get even remotely buzzed lately.

    What’s Truth and what’s perception? What’s wisdom and what’s mere justification? How do I know when I’m being the bad guy, and when I’m just standing up for myself?

    When push comes to shove we are all just fumbling in the dark.”

    You totally hit onto something that I’ve been feeling off and on for some time. It was so nice to see someone else put it into words. The more I read the Tao I Ching the more I wonder if the club scene is where I should be. I am beginning to think that nothing is “real” that everything is just perception of what reality “is”. I’ve struggled with trying to find balance in defending when I think I’ve been wronged and somehow becoming the bad guy in everything. My experiences with trying to “stand up for myself” seem to be all negative and a no win situation. Just once I would like to do just that and have someone go… hey, you’re right.

    In terms of fumbling around in the dark. I really like to find a light switch.

    *hugs*

  9. Once you see yourself for exactly who and what you are, you will know truth. It’s hard. Most people never get there.

    “Wisdom” and “justification” depend on your point of view. When you know yourself, you’ll know when you’re doing one or the other, or both.

    Standing up for yourself may make you the bad guy to someone else. Sometimes, you can’t help that.

    Can you coax your mind from its wandering
    and keep to the original oneness?
    Can you let your body become
    supple as a newborn child’s?
    Can you cleanse your inner vision
    until you see nothing but the light?
    Can you love people and lead them
    without imposing your will?
    Can you deal with the most vital matters
    by letting events take their course?
    Can you step back from you own mind
    and thus understand all things?

    Giving birth and nourishing,
    having without possessing,
    acting with no expectations,
    leading and not trying to control:
    this is the supreme virtue.

    1. What a deep thought.

      Can you love people and lead them without imposing your will?
      While a worthy goal, complete negation of the ego seems unattainable.

      Can you step back from you own mind and thus understand all things?
      All things?

      This is an interesting meditation. Is there a reference?
      Thanks,
      Chris

      1. Re: What a deep thought.

        I’m not sure what “complete negation” of the ego looks like, or if I even understand the term. I think it’s more a matter of mastering ourselves regardless of what our ego demands or requires.

        “All things” is not a reference to a lexicon knowlege of every thing that is, but an understanding of the “way” of things. I don’t have to know the location of every thread in a tapestry to understand its nature and construction.

        What I quoted is the 10th chapter from the Tao Te Ching, by Lao Tzu.

        1. Re: What a deep thought.

          You have to love the Tao Te Ching.

        2. Re: What a deep thought.

          You have to love the Tao Te Ching.

      2. Re: What a deep thought.

        I’m not sure what “complete negation” of the ego looks like, or if I even understand the term. I think it’s more a matter of mastering ourselves regardless of what our ego demands or requires.

        “All things” is not a reference to a lexicon knowlege of every thing that is, but an understanding of the “way” of things. I don’t have to know the location of every thread in a tapestry to understand its nature and construction.

        What I quoted is the 10th chapter from the Tao Te Ching, by Lao Tzu.

    2. What a deep thought.

      Can you love people and lead them without imposing your will?
      While a worthy goal, complete negation of the ego seems unattainable.

      Can you step back from you own mind and thus understand all things?
      All things?

      This is an interesting meditation. Is there a reference?
      Thanks,
      Chris

  10. Once you see yourself for exactly who and what you are, you will know truth. It’s hard. Most people never get there.

    “Wisdom” and “justification” depend on your point of view. When you know yourself, you’ll know when you’re doing one or the other, or both.

    Standing up for yourself may make you the bad guy to someone else. Sometimes, you can’t help that.

    Can you coax your mind from its wandering
    and keep to the original oneness?
    Can you let your body become
    supple as a newborn child’s?
    Can you cleanse your inner vision
    until you see nothing but the light?
    Can you love people and lead them
    without imposing your will?
    Can you deal with the most vital matters
    by letting events take their course?
    Can you step back from you own mind
    and thus understand all things?

    Giving birth and nourishing,
    having without possessing,
    acting with no expectations,
    leading and not trying to control:
    this is the supreme virtue.

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