You can’t spell “belief” without “lie”

So let’s be rational. What are some of the lies I tell myself which cause me unhappiness?

  • My environment is a part of me. It must be clean and orderly in order for me to be happy.
  • It is my responsibility to save my loved ones from tragedy.
  • My stepchildren must behave like I did when I was their age for them to be good, healthy kids.
  • Others ought to have the same sense of organization that I do.

It’s a start.

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  1. It is my responsibility to save my loved ones from tragedy.

    Well, it is, I think, up to a point. We should look out for those dear to us. But sometimes loved ones do destructive things, and one cannot stop them. (Such as my sister’s marriage.)

    OTOH, if you mean that it is solely your responsibility, then I think that you are taking on more than you should. So yes, this becomes one of the lies we tell ourselves.

  2. Hmmm.
    I think it’s healthy to enumerate these things; attaching words to the hidden assumptions can sometimes help deflate them.
    – Chaos abounds. If you perceive order outside of pure abstract logic, you may not be looking closely enough. Which is probably a feature.
    – Save? I like Job 40 when I feel like I can save something.
    – How can anyone else be you? Are you even capable of consistantly adhering to your idealized behavior patterns?
    – Boo, hiss. It’s fascinating to go to a code review, and say, ‘Wow, I never perceived the information that way.’ Of course, given my advanced state of perfection, I usually follow that with: ‘I will just be submitting this atrocity to

  3. i want both of you to know. that what ever happens, i am here for you both, and will offer an ear to you both as besti can. *big hugs* and i hope that the resulting outcome is what will be best for you both and for both of your happinesses. love you both.

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