Whenever anyone asks me what I want for my birthday/Christmas/Hanukkah/etc. I always say “bookmarks”.
“Ha ha! No really, what do you want?” they inevitably reply.
“No really, bookmarks” I say.
I still don’t understand what’s so outlandish or difficult about this request. But since it seems to cause a lot of consternation, I’ll break it down into steps.
- Find some interesting bits of paper. Maybe some newspapers you found in the attic, or a spirograph drawing.
- Cut the paper into bookmark-shaped rectangles.
- Go to your local UPS store and have them laminated.
- (Optional) if you’re feeling especially artsy, punch a hole in one end and attach a ribbon. Viola, you have produced a gift that will bring a smile to my face, probably for under $5.
However, if all this sounds too much like arts & crafts day at summer camp for you, here’s an alternate procedure that requires zero assembly:
- Visit one of your local attractions. A state park, or the world’s biggest ball of earwax, or perhaps your neighborhood bordello.
- Find the gift shop.
- Buy a bookmark.
I really am that easy to please. Attached is exhibit A, some bookmarks my mom made me for Hanukkah. Thanks, mom!