Activists protested technology with a scary-sounding name in front of an Eddie Bauer store recently. “I’m not sure what it is” said dreadlocked activist Sunflower Joy Pretzel, “but it’s new, and new things are bad”. Environmentalists, concerned because they knew a guy who read a book about intelligent pudding taking over the earth, have been trying to raise awareness of nanotechnology and the possible dangers it poses. Another protester, Pat O’McReillysonnigan, a member of Teamsters Local #63, had a different concern in mind: “The unions look out for the little guy, and there’s no one littler than nanites.” “I’m not against new technology; I just want to see that microscopic robots get paid a fair day’s wage and compete on equal terms with other hard-working Americans”.
The Eddie Bauer company could not be reached for comment; but a corporate spokesdroid for NeoSysDyneMicroWareSynerWorldInterCo/JC Penny Inc. had this to say: “Our products have been thoroughly tested on a variety of endangered species with no ill effects. We are confidant that your assimilation into the collective will be painless, and will leave you with a clean, fresh feeling which will last all day under normal conditions.”
You know, they have a point. I bought a pair of Dockers with the stain-resistant coating, and they totally itched. Someone should definitely look into that.
The stain resistant coating is made of Teflon. If you look at the label inside the pair of pants, it says that.
/me used to have a pair of stain-resistant Dockers
/me is sad that I gained weight so that they don’t fit me anymore
/me is happy that my mom can wear them now, though. 🙂
I know that this was a tongue-in-cheek post, but I figured I might as well share this info. 🙂
The stain resistant coating is made of Teflon. If you look at the label inside the pair of pants, it says that.
/me used to have a pair of stain-resistant Dockers
/me is sad that I gained weight so that they don’t fit me anymore
/me is happy that my mom can wear them now, though. 🙂
I know that this was a tongue-in-cheek post, but I figured I might as well share this info. 🙂
dammit…
you know.. it would be nice if protesters really knew what the fuck they were talking about.. It is one thing to have fears about real life self-propelled nano-machines produced in the quadrillions buzzing around the atmosphere.. and quite another to worry about “nano-technology” which is really just fucking chemistry… Don’t they realize that eddie bauer’s stuff is more about biting of the “coolness” factor of “nanotechnology” than real nano-technology…
Damn hippies…
dammit…
you know.. it would be nice if protesters really knew what the fuck they were talking about.. It is one thing to have fears about real life self-propelled nano-machines produced in the quadrillions buzzing around the atmosphere.. and quite another to worry about “nano-technology” which is really just fucking chemistry… Don’t they realize that eddie bauer’s stuff is more about biting of the “coolness” factor of “nanotechnology” than real nano-technology…
Damn hippies…