I wonder if my abnormally social tendencies lately, rather than being healthy growth, have been an attempt to mask underlying discontent, stress, or depression?
Or maybe they are the result of some combination of the above. I can’t believe that they are completely negative. I’ve gotten a lot of benefits already from being more outgoing.
But I feel a little like I might be running from myself.
You know, not everything has to be either good or bad. It can be both. So you may indeed be reaping good benefits from something that is, in fact, a coping mechanism. That’s quite possible.
On the whole, I think the best way for you to deal with this is to really begin scrutinizing your own behavior and thought patterns, so you can discover what lies behind them.
And if I may offer my honest opinion: I do think you’re running from yourself. But what I think isn’t going to help you unless you can see it for yourself.
do you find yourself making more friends that offer real opportunities for further growth and understanding? or simply making more friends? how do you decide who to get to know and who to sit back and observe more? what qualities really make those decisions for you?
do you find yourself making more friends that offer real opportunities for further growth and understanding?
Yes. That’s the only kind I make. I don’t really have a choice in that; I find myself talking to and hanging out with people who challenge and stimulate me, and losing interest quickly in those who don’t.
If thats the case, you are doing fine in this regard. If you find yourself putting more effort towards fluffy vacuous interactions than you do towards intelligent rapport, then be concerned.
maybe it is all the above and just something that you are not use to yet, give yourself time, as well asfind the underlying thoughts and patterns and what not. trust me, it does take time, i am not the same as i was 8 or 9 months ago. have i grown since then, immensly, would i ever want to go back to being that person i was then? never. would i do it all over again, absolutely. and the things that i have learned that were not me, i have felt and thought those very same things. i am happier now i think. so take your time i say.
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