The Fish: A Parody of Friendship

May 31, 2005 20 Comments

I have a FISH for you. It is a very large and delicious FISH. It took me many years to learn the skills to catch such a FISH.

I know you said several times that you needed chocolate, and that you have plenty of fish, but this FISH is what I have for you right now. It is a symbol of how much I care for you as a friend. If you won’t accept my FISH, it must mean you don’t value my friendship.

Yes, the FISH is slimy and it’s scales may cut you. But I promise you it is worth it. I know you think chocolate is all you need; but trust me: you need this FISH. I wish someone had given me a FISH such as this when I was in your position.

You can’t expect people to give you exactly what you want all the time. If you really didn’t want this FISH, you shouldn’t have told all your friends about your craving for chocolate. You can’t reasonably expect all of us to have the chocolate you want. Everyone has something different to offer, and I am offering you a lovely FISH. You should be more grateful for the things you are freely given. Someday you may want nothing more than FISH, and what will you do then?

In conclusion, take this FISH as a token of my love and affection for you. Someday you will thank me.

Note: this is not a parody of anyone reading this, nor does it refer to any of my personal friendships. It is merely an observation on human relations, inspired by comments in someone else’s journal.

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20 Comments

  1. matrixx May 31, 2005 at 19:51

    *SHUDDER* Fishes do NOT make good gifts, metaphorical or otherwise. YUCK!

  2. matrixx May 31, 2005 at 19:51

    *SHUDDER* Fishes do NOT make good gifts, metaphorical or otherwise. YUCK!

  3. shangchi May 31, 2005 at 19:59

    Is it swordfish steak?

    Other than that, there’s really only one thing I like that smells like fish.

  4. shangchi May 31, 2005 at 19:59

    Is it swordfish steak?

    Other than that, there’s really only one thing I like that smells like fish.

  5. ex_greymaide85 May 31, 2005 at 21:16

    Heh, thanks Avdi 🙂

    1. avdi May 31, 2005 at 21:23

      I’m glad it amused you 🙂

      I really needed to vent about what I was seeing, but I knew doing so on your journal wouldn’t have served any constructive purpose. Thus, this.

    2. avdi May 31, 2005 at 21:23

      I’m glad it amused you 🙂

      I really needed to vent about what I was seeing, but I knew doing so on your journal wouldn’t have served any constructive purpose. Thus, this.

  6. ex_greymaide85 May 31, 2005 at 21:16

    Heh, thanks Avdi 🙂

  7. darkpool May 31, 2005 at 22:41

    I know people like this.

  8. darkpool May 31, 2005 at 22:41

    I know people like this.

  9. c4bl3fl4m3 June 1, 2005 at 00:38

    Uhm…

    is it a chocolate covered fish?

    1. avdi June 1, 2005 at 15:00

      Re: Uhm…

      It’s all about YOU and YOUR needs, isn’t it? Why can’t you just think about somebody else for a change, and accept the FISH I went to all this trouble to procure for you?

      😉

      1. c4bl3fl4m3 June 2, 2005 at 13:37

        Re: Uhm…

        Because in this life, all we really truly have in the end is ourselves.
        We’re born alone. We die alone.

        I am the one constant in my life. Other people come and go, but I’m always there.

        😉

      2. c4bl3fl4m3 June 2, 2005 at 13:37

        Re: Uhm…

        Because in this life, all we really truly have in the end is ourselves.
        We’re born alone. We die alone.

        I am the one constant in my life. Other people come and go, but I’m always there.

        😉

    2. avdi June 1, 2005 at 15:00

      Re: Uhm…

      It’s all about YOU and YOUR needs, isn’t it? Why can’t you just think about somebody else for a change, and accept the FISH I went to all this trouble to procure for you?

      😉

  10. c4bl3fl4m3 June 1, 2005 at 00:38

    Uhm…

    is it a chocolate covered fish?

  11. tricstmr June 1, 2005 at 16:36

    thank you..

    For the fish.. I’m sure I can use it right now…

    in fact.. I can definitely use it…

    In return, I must admit, that I, at the moment, do have some brownies to give you..

    really.. i mean it.. I have extra brownies and since I’m trying to lose some weight at the moment.. I especially don’t need these brownies..

    Oh.. one thing.. they are Jalepeno brownies.. I hope that is not a problem.. they’re just like other brownies..
    but spicy..

    What do you mean.. you’re not sure you’ll like jalepeno brownies… Oh.. I’m sure you will.. it will open your mind… it will help you accept different cultures and cuisines!

    1. avdi June 2, 2005 at 14:32

      Re: thank you..

      In fact, I rather enjoy Jalapeno brownies, thank you very much 😀

    2. avdi June 2, 2005 at 14:32

      Re: thank you..

      In fact, I rather enjoy Jalapeno brownies, thank you very much 😀

  12. tricstmr June 1, 2005 at 16:36

    thank you..

    For the fish.. I’m sure I can use it right now…

    in fact.. I can definitely use it…

    In return, I must admit, that I, at the moment, do have some brownies to give you..

    really.. i mean it.. I have extra brownies and since I’m trying to lose some weight at the moment.. I especially don’t need these brownies..

    Oh.. one thing.. they are Jalepeno brownies.. I hope that is not a problem.. they’re just like other brownies..
    but spicy..

    What do you mean.. you’re not sure you’ll like jalepeno brownies… Oh.. I’m sure you will.. it will open your mind… it will help you accept different cultures and cuisines!

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